The Irons

2265 days ago

97.5% of Irons are not Irons - West Ham virtue signals again

West Ham United's St Valentine's day tweet is to suggest that we consider which three of those who have played for the club have had "beauty that has caught the eye". Apparently the top three "whose beauty caught the eye of the Claret and Blue Army, who swooned over their film-star looks and toned physiques in a West Ham United kit" are in reverse order Tomkins, Ljunberg and Dani. FFS. Ger real you fools.

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2751 days ago

Photo Article: baby Joshua with his grandfather: now about West Ham and Social Services

As you may know, my daughter is a diehard West Ham supporter. She is also, incidentally, a total goal machine for her top of the table side. Her membership of Slaven Bilic's claret and blue army is good for me as it is someone to talk to after a game: The mrs is not interested and has never been to a game with me. I am ticked off by my daughter when I start talking about relegation but we can share the joy after the mighty Irons get a result as we did yesterday.

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2978 days ago

Bringing my daughter up to support West Ham - no longer a Social Services offence: 1965 arrives

For some reason my daughter is a soccer nut and has followed her father over land and sea (okay I exaggerate) as a diehard hammer. When she trains with her club it is in her West Ham shirt and shorts (Christmas present) and after big games we always have a chat. I have just received a delivery at the front door from the West Ham store.

You see it had a special offer a few days ago - a replica Cup Winners Cup shirt from 1965 for £19.65. So natch I bought two, one for me which I am now wearing - having taken off my Pride of E13 T-shirt which the Mrs had suggested was a tad in need of a wash - and one for the daughter. I shall post it later today and know that she will share the thrill I enjoyed whe her shirt arrives.

There have been times when I wondered if Social Services would be concerned about how I had introduced the daughter to The Irons.

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3383 days ago

Am I hexing West Ham? Bristol City on Sunday

As you know I have guided West Ham to the brink of Champions League football by studiously paying no attention to every game played and avoiding going anywhere near a match or even watching on TV. When I have weakened and thought about attending a game, suddenly The Irons stop playing like Brazil and start playing like a Hackney Marshes side. I must warn you that with the Hammers travelling to my home City of Bristol this Sunday for an FA Cup game, my resolve weakened.

My daughter is in town and I tried to buy a pair of tickets off an online site. Luckily www.ticketbis.net offers the most useless service on this planet and treats potential customers like shite. I was promised calls back, I harried, a bloke called me asking for my business and said right now go buy tickets online only to find there were none. This company is run by a bunch of total wankers from Liverpool.  The sooner the welfare safari that is scouseland is towed off into the Irish Sea and sunk the better. I heartily advise that you never use this company ever, not even to buy a stolen hub cap.

So no tickets. That prevents an almost certain cup upset. However I should warn you

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3464 days ago

The Sacrifice I have made for West Ham and its inspired manager Fat Sam Allardyce

For longer than I can remember I have had seats at West Ham. Years of misery has been the only result. Worse still I have taught my daughter to support the Irons, taken her to games and she is now a diehard hammer. It is the sort of act that should get me reported to Social Services.

Last year was dreadful. West Ham were not only hopeless but dull too. I could take it no more and at £650 a pop my season tickets were not renewed. I dithered about a late renewal after a couple of summer signings by Fat Sam but our early exit from the Carling Cup kept me strong. I was not renewing.

It was at that point that West Ham started playing like Brazil. 

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3648 days ago

West Ham vs. Spurs at lunchtime & why Fat Sam must go

I hope the game is on TV somewhere here in Athens and I shall be cheering on the Irons from Greece. Or will I be? Of course I will, hell's teeth this is The Scum at home is it not?

I cannot see Norwich winning at Stamford Bridge tomorrow (or for that matter at home to Arsenal next week) and thus even if we lose to the Scum we should be mathematically safe. And so I am just a bit torn.

Naturally I want to make it 3 out of 3 this year against the Scum. I cannot bring myself to hope for any other result and one would hope that the players are up for the match knowing that this is how the fans feel.  I am sad to say it but this is our Cup Final.

But if we lose or draw? 

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3782 days ago

Why I do not write articles on Bulletin Boards/LinkedIn groups

I appear to have fallen out with another LinkedIn Group – the West Ham Supporters. My “crime” is that I posted links to articles wot I wrote about the Irons. Apparently to stay there I have to write the whole piece on that discussion group.

Hmmm. I am a writer and earn a living from writing articles. So how about a new business model for me? I shall stop writing for websites where I earn money and will just post articles direct on LinkedIn Groups or on Bulletin Boards and so earn no money.

Can anyone spot the minor flaw in that one?

If you are not a professional writer and you wish to post your thoughts (judging by the timings, in many cases when you are being paid by someone else to do an actual job) that is fine.

But if you actually get the cash to pay for cat food, vets bills, a round of drinks at the Conservative Club and other essential things in life by being a writer, but then give everything away for free I would suggest you have a problem.

On that basis I have quit West Ham LinkedIn supporters. A surprising number of folks from there read this website. They know where to find me…

I guess it is better to quit than to be evicted as I was from the LinkedIN Friends of Greece and UKIP groups.


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